walk with me now/the value of horology

– will you be able to bring it to a conclusion? she asked wisely.

– maybe. i don’t know. i hope so. i would at least know one way or the other whether to put energy into it or not, i replied uncertainly. but we’ll talk about it when i see you.

[aside – i now have several notebook pages titled “Conversations I Need to Have”].

it just might be on. scary.

there are ingredients, elements. trying to figure out if they’re omens too. need to just figure out whether or not this is a path. i’ve been looking at it for a while, at the same time walking on a different road. at the very least, i should be able to know where to step next. get rid of this service road feeling that’s been hanging around for two years.

bobby taylor, the answer is yes. let me ask you that same question.


current obsession: cyborgs (again).

virtuereality will eventually subsume me.

re-kindled by a talk on embodiment. i exist more online than i do in the physical world, evidenced by the surprise on friends’ faces when i’m seen in public. oh well. the amount of thinking, processing, and working out i’ve been doing, i should probably be removed any way. my mindscape’s getting compartmentalized.

i don’t know how to talk to people any more. social awkwardness, magnified.


new language to theorise my mental. themes of the past little while: historicisation, spatialisation, temporality. removed from advanced theory, re-applied to emotions. temporality’s been throwing me off. when i have time (a mantra, repeat several thousand times over), i will study time. what is this pressing sense of urgency?

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